Guilt and Burnout

So I decided to take a break.

And it wasn’t because this blog made me feel burnt out or stressed. In fact, I have so many post ideas for this blog that I’m a little overwhelmed! However, this blog doesn’t provide me with any income and because of that, I work full time outside of putting effort into this blog. And the longer that I work my full time job, the more I’m feeling burnt out on anything that actually brings me joy.

My acid reflux is back, to the point where I can’t even bend over when I wake up in the morning or I risk throwing up (sorry if that’s TMI). I’m also falling asleep before 8:30 almost every single night. Literally nothing is bringing me joy (like I got accepted into an online college program and I cried because I was scared over how I’m going to balance full time work and full time school instead of getting excited over finally going back to school). So I got burnt out and this blog took the brunt of that. And I felt guilty, so so guilty over taking a break because this was the last thing that I wanted to take a break with. If anything, I need a break from my full time job! But that will never happen…

It’s frustrating to feel guilty over needing a break. But I don’t know what else to do. I’ll be starting classes at the end of August and I know that school needs to be a priority, but I also really need the income that my full time job provides. I’m at a crossroads that looks like the only choice that works is to let myself continue to get burnt out and continue to be exhausted and sad all the time because I can’t prioritize my happiness. And I know that sounds awful but I have no idea what else to do.

I’ve been off this blog for almost two weeks and it would be so easy to just continue to not post. Like that would be so easy, but that’s not what I want to do. I just finished rereading The Opposite of Loneliness by Marina Keegan and was so inspired to start writing again but when everything else in my life piles up I just break.

I really miss when seeing my “path” was easy. I miss having simple choices and being inspired and joyful. It’s been a long time since then.

So anyways, to make a long story short. I’m back. (LOL how many times have you heard that line from me??) I’ve got a number of posts I’ll be working on this weekend, I’m planning on spending most of Saturday at the library since I have to register for classes too. I just really hope that something magically happens that makes every decision clear to me in the next few weeks.

Thanks for reading my drama. Happy Friday.

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Procrastination 


So I don’t know about you guys, but I have the hardest time when it comes to procrastination. I can be very motivated to do things but when it comes to tackling big projects (especially during the summer) I find myself making excuses at every turn. The past few summers I’ve had summer reading assignments for my English classes and this year was no different.

Summer Reading Supplies

My goal this upcoming school year is to stop procrastinating. It’s definitely a big goal for me but I feel like with more time to work on things and less work I should be able to tackle what I need to on a day to day basis.

Here are some reasons to stop procrastinating:

1. You’ll have more time once you’re done to be able to do things that you want to do instead of working on all the work you’ve put off.

2. There’s a sense of accomplishment to having done all you have to do on time, or even earlier than you need it to
be done.

3. Once you’ve gotten into the habit of getting your work done on time you’ll be more productive and actually get your work done on a regular basis.

Summer Reading

If you’re like me, then these probably won’t be all the motivation you need in order to stop procrastinating. These are some things that I’ve been doing to try and make better habits:

1. I avoid rewarding myself with time on the internet. If I do, I’ll play one level of Candy Crush, or watch a YouTube video but I don’t check social media.I find that if I let myself go on social media I spend way too much time on it and don’t get any work done.

2. I do reward myself though, like I said I’ll play a level of Candy Crush, or watch a YouTube video during a break but I also reward myself with other things too. Usually for when I’m done with all the tasks I figure out a “big” prize, sometimes I plan a relaxing night, order food for dinner, buy something I have on my wish list, something like that. For smaller rewards I usually make, or buy myself coffee or tea, spend time scrolling through social media, or watch a movie. It’s always great to have something to look forward to at the end of a long To-Do list.

2. I gather everything that I could need while working on my project and put it where I’ll be working. The only reason I let myself leave my workspace is if I have to go to the bathroom.

3. While I do try to leave my workspace as fewtimes as possible, I do give myself breaks. I try to work for at least half an hour at a time and then take a five to ten minute break. Breaks are really important because if you work for too long you will get burnt out.

4. Just do it. Make a list of everything you need to get done, prioritize them, alternating tasks that are hard and ones that are easy. Then sit down and get to work and don’t stop until you have everything done. Once you’re finished you will feel so much better about things and it will alleviate so much stress.Summer Reading Rewards

Do any of you have issues with procrastination? What are your favorite ways to keep yourself motivated?

Have a great day everyone!